one might say we're banned from that church
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
