Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
