I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I think a kid would responsible me up
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize