It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
