Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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