Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
