yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
