I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm at about main and main street
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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