Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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