The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
