No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
His nipple licking is glorious
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