he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
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he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
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