I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize