the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
