what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I cockslap morals
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
