my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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