what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
