Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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