Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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