I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
