I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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