Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
