Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
There was a lot of him and a little penis
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
