that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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