I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize