OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize