apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
