Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
