He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
