U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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