I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
