none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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