I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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