Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
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She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
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I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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