I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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