do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I want to fling myself into the sun
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize