This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize