so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
