is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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