did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
