Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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