There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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