Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
