so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
