Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize