just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
