Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
