apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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