I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
