I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
