Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
