Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
